Just Seh Fe’

“Anyhow dem even seh fe’ mi gone”, that was exactly how I felt on the morning of July 27, 2020 and I expressed this feeling to the Lord as I reasoned with him prior to carrying out the task I believed that he was sending me to do. “Lord”, I argued, “the deadline has passed and they said we should not come after the specified date and still you are sending me …..I sure hope that this means that my obligation to you will be absolved if there is even the slightest hint of objection, because surely you wouldnt expect me to argue with them over this, right Lord!!?” The background to this conversation with God came on the heels of my youngest son passing his exams for the prestigious Kingston College (KC). What should have been the resounding din of cheers and congratulations were shortcurcuited by the ears and ambitions of a disappointed 12 year old who bemoaned the fact that his efforts were not enough to earn him a place at “the school of his choice”. No amount of cajolling could convince my son that his achievements were to be lauded and so he asked for a transfer. Going against the pangs of a heart that longed to soothe away his dissappointment, I had to tell him “no” as a matter of principle… it was a stand that I had taken when his brother went through a similar situation and so I couldn’t do for one child what I had been unwilling to do for the other. With the matter settled in my own mind I vowed to find a way to help my son accept his fate and so I began to make plans for him to attend summer classes at his new school as I thought this would help with the adjustment process. You would imagine my surprise when my own father initiated and received a transfer for my son to his brother’s school. The action was so unchacteristic of my dad that I began to see his intervention as divinely inspired not only because of the assured “blessing” of having both boys in one place (one drop off in the morning and one pick up in the afternoon) but also because it taught me lessons about the Justice of a God who in similar situations would not have been limited by human perception of fair and unfair but instead He chooses to treat each of His children, as our need demands. More on this particular topic anon. Fastforward to the middle of summer school my son who vehemently opposed the very notion of attending KC did a complete 360 degrees, and was now flatly refusing to be transferred. Did I tell you the transfer was granted? I tried everything to convince this strong willed youngman to change his mind again. Being unsuccessful in my efforts I committed the matter to God albeit with the secret hope that he’d allow my son to see the benefits to be gained. Though I committed the matter to the one who could change the stubbornest of hearts I sensed through a series of events that the heart that God was bent on changing was my own. Chief among the experiences that God used to convince me that my son should remain at KC was when He sovereignly directed me to have him do his medical at a particular health facility. During the visit we learned that the doctor had very close ties to KC as she openly shared about the current involvement of her family members with the school. Of all the health facilities that I could have done the medical at …..and of all the doctors that could have been in duty when we arrived ….. I marvelled at the sovereignty of God and had to concede that through this experience the Lord was speaking to me….but still I grappled with just how convenient the transfer would be as I was already familiar with the administrators and I could slip from one class to the other participating in devotions and other school based activities with both boys. It would have been “soooooo” convenient. So here I was on the morning of July 27 with a decision to make, I could choose the convenience that the transfer would offer or I could choose the direction that I was sensing God steer us towards. Remembering that it was better to harken to the will of God….I took a deep breath and reluctantly went to register my son at KC, all the time reminding the Lord that the deadline for registration had passed and I would not be arguing or grovelling at the feet of a soul trying to convince them to accept him at this late stage. I concluded our conversation on the matter by saying God if this is gonna happen you have to make it go through without my intervention. Don’t laugh at me, but as you can guess, the process was such a breeze…..and without need for any argument. I was in and out of the school in under 30mins so I couldnt even use that as a crutch to raise another objection to God. With the process complete God suggested that I document the journey not only for the sake of posterity but so that I can remind myself that the journey that we now embark on at KC is God ordered and ordained and so in the face of opposition or doubt which may come along the way I may be reminded that the Lord himself authored and orchestrated this and so we will be trusting Him through the journey each and every step of the way. AMEN